Saturday, February 27, 2010

If you don't scrub that kitchen floor, you ain't gonna rock and roll no more

A cautionary tale (mostly to myself):

So, today I decided to (try to) do something nice. You see, my roommates are great people but aren't so great at doing the dishes and keeping things clean. I thought that perhaps if I cleaned the whole kitchen and we had a small roommate meeting that then, maybe, it would be like a fresh start. Perhaps people would feel more inclined to keep things clean if they started out clean.

I did all the dishes. That was fine.
I emptied the trash. That was also fine.
I put away stray appliances.
I wiped down the toaster and other things that would remain on the counter.
I wiped down the counters. All fine.

Then I notice that the side of the stove could use a little wipe down and I figure it probably hasn't been swept under in a while so I decide to pull it out. I also lift up the top of the stove to clean under the burners. (I didn't know that people didn't know you could do that...) NOT fine. Apparently no one has pulled the stove out in several years. There is mold from some sort of water damage, lots of cereal, a pizza pan and a whole lot of dust. Oh, and one of those sponge things you put in water that grows into a surprise shape, this one is a dinosaur. I nearly vomited. Under the top of the stove there is some sort of goo that would explain why the kitchen stinks anytime I try to cook.

I also thought it would be a good idea to pull out the refrigerator and clean under and behind it. There are about 37 boxes of cereal on top of our refrigerator plus a few bottles of soda left over from random parties. As I'm moving the refrigerator a bottle of Coke falls and is impaled on the grate on the back of the refrigerator. Immediately soda is everywhere.

I've mopped up the soda from the floor, wall and refrigerator and I am now waiting for that to dry so I can do the actual mopping. I started this project almost two hours ago and the end is still a far way off.

I write this not to complain but to remind myself that next time I'm feeling the urge to be nice maybe I should turn and run in the opposite direction. Also, feel free to come over anytime. The kitchen will be very clean!


  1. Jodi,

    First off, thank you so much for the invitation to come over. Second, I feel totally the same way about the "fresh start" attitude. How old are we and still have to teach our roommates to pick up after themselves? And how did they not now about cleaning under the burners? I even know how. They make stoves with easy access springs now to life the top of it. And the coke story...priceless. I have to clean off the top of our fridge too. When I still lived at home and we fried a lot more things, I hated cleaning the top of the fridge b/c it was always filmy.

    In review, though, please continue to be the one who pokes and prods the roommates to keep a clean establishment. It's a chore, yes, but it is totally worth it. Some kids are not as fortunate to have clean freaks as mothers and were never taught the pure joy in cleaning. Ok, maybe you don't find pure joy but I find a certain euphoria. Is that why I'm not married. Bwhahaha!!

    And only for irony'e sake: "If you don't scrub that kitchen floor, you ain't gonna rock and ____ no more." Love ya!

  2. we've been cleaning all morning too. we're definitely not going to pull the stove or fridge out after reading this.

  3. I can vouch for the fact that under the stove top was cleaned beautifully three years ago in April. It was so disqusting when I moved in that i gagged while cleaning it. nasty nasty nasty. But since then...ill bet you were the first to take on that task. Love you girl and your kitchen is VERY clean. Well done!!

  4. Isn't especially sad when you try to be nice and only bad comes of it. I really hate when that happens.